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HELLO SUMMER, where you been my whole life? Like it's a magical season when you actually own the pool you're taking a dip in while relaxing on a giant blow up chair because you know the only kid peeing in it is you or your kid sister. And that gives me peace of mind. I've enough time to stew (I love saying this, stew, I stewed over something) about my birthday because in comparison to every other birthday ever, it was pretty low-key. Last year was like a giant ball of awkward awkwardness for too many reasons to mention and when it came down to it, I was so ready to sit in my aforementioned giant blow up chair and float in my pee-free pool. Just me and my family. Like okay, I'm gonna go all deep here, sorry. I used to be one of those guys that like everybody became my friend and then they became my family, and I don't know, it's regrettable because eight point five times out of ten, I can see where that ended up being a mistake. I'm not gonna go all OHMYGOD EMOTIONALLY CLOSED OFF, but Cooper's taught me that at the end of the day, it's the people who have always been there that are probably going to keep being there. SO THANKS FOR BEING AWESOME FRIENDS, YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, ALL OF YOU. I MEAN IT. That's my little nugget of wisdom for you.
I feel like a big pile of emotional goo now. Uh. It's like having a baby gave me additional hormones or something. But anyway, have you guys seen those commercials for Onlinebootycall.com? HILARIOUS. Like I enjoy the swipes all these dating companies are taking at each other when at the end of the day, YOU'RE STILL USING A COMPUTER DATING SERVICE. I don't know, there's something equally freaky about using a questionnaire to find your one true love or someone to fill your needs. I mean, does no one watch the news? Like the Craig's List killer? You could be like oh, you're a fine young lady, wanna go out for a nice dinner? and then WHAM! she ties you up, steals your money, and shoots your, or whatever, and then you don't even get laid. The world is a horrible place!
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